Hello, world. It’s been a while. I
don't know if anyone is out there, if anyone is listening, watching, reading,
if anyone is kind or sane enough to stumble into my little pocket of sunshine
that is this blog, if anyone is even interested or ever interested, or if
there's going to be a soul who gets to read my thoughts and what I write or
will write, but I feel like I owe it to myself to write, something, anything,
so I will give it my best shot. Regardless if no one is ever going to read
this, I will write, something, anything, out of zilch, out of pure interest or
curiosity, because I feel that I am destined to write, even if I don’t get
anything from it.
Not that introductions are necessary, but, Hi! I am Nin, a 22
year-old dreamer and wanderer from the Philippines. I assume that you are
inclined with your World History and Geography and that you read or watch the
news so yes, I am from that country oftentimes belittled in western TV series
or broadsheets for the typical third-world judgments, but let me remind you: I
am not my country and I am not my people's history or economy. I am a Filipino,
despite my lack of affinity to the Malay race from which we are said to
have descended from. I may have dark hair, big dark brown eyes, but I don’t
have a flat nose and my skin is fair enough to pass as Chinese or Japanese. I am
a Filipino and despite what people say and think about us, I am damn proud to
be one.
Professionally speaking, you can
find me hauling an 8-hour shift a day in a hospital, caring for people I hardly
know, sweating so much to not even earn half of just about what I worked hard
work and deserve. I am in no position to complain as I am in the far bottom of
the food chain. I cannot remember the last time my feet didn’t hurt or when I
said I am not tired when I got home, but I love what I do and as cliché as it
may sound, I can get away with it just as long as I am being appreciated for
it.
Realistically speaking, I don’t even
know why I am at the bedside when I have always imagined myself as the boss, the
doctor who gives out orders and not the one who carries them out. I don’t know
yet. I haven’t figured it out yet. To go or not to go to a Med School isn’t
really my question now, but why. And just to give you an idea of how confused
and driven I am, I also wanted to go to a Law School but one thing I cannot
deal with is dishonesty, so without a qualm, I stashed my dreams of being a
lawyer in a tiny, tattered John Grisham novel somewhere in my shelf, and yet
sometimes I see that book opening itself right in front of me.
I know you have a story as to why
you keep a blog or why you write and you probably have been writing all your
life as well. As for myself, I grew up reading – a lot. The interest in writing
didn’t spark until I was in third of fourth grade when I’ve read the first book
that made me cry, weep even. I used to write competitively in high school and
college, some of which I have won, some I have learned from, and I was privileged
enough to edit my high school and college paper, something I took to escape what
I perceived to be 'filthy' school politics. In the realm of a pen and behind the glare
of publicity, I have found my niche, and I have found my way to lead and be a rolemodel.
From then on, I’d always ask my mom
or my sister to buy me pretty notebooks so I can write my thoughts, doodle, and
just catharsize. I hardly call it a diary and the idea of keeping a diary
repulses me since I feel like I am obliged to write even if I do not want to. This
blog will pretty much be like that. A notebook. Not a diary. A virtual notebook
where I can scribble my thoughts, my current flavor, my mood, my present, my future,
and maybe if it didn’t hurt so much then, even my past. I may jump into the
bandwagon and even pen some reviews, opinions, and whatsnot, and get criticized
at that. I warn you though. It’s been weeks, months since I came up with
something. I may commit literary horrors and the common grammatical mistakes that
even the simplest of it can bring you to the edge of your seat but I assure you:
I want to learn and be taught, as I write my story, any given story, anything
that is worth writing about, so your thoughts are highly likely to mold me. A few
of you will like what I have here, some will hate it or won’t even give a damn
about it. But I wouldn’t care as much because like I said in the beginning of
this post – I will write, something, anything, because I feel that I owe myself
this little much.
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